7.09 "Avenger 2.0" Transcript

7.09 "Avenger 2.0"

Episode Guide

• 7.09 "Avenger 2.0" Episode Guide

Précis

With Daniel co-ordinating a risky relocation project on a planet rocked by seismic tremors while Jack and Teal'c attempt to make peace among warring Jaffa factions, Carter and Dr. Felger work on a virus that will scramble the established settings of a DHD, rendering a specific gate useless. It seems a brilliant plan until Ba'al proves himself to be the better hacker.

Guide | Transcript

Transcript

TEASER

VOICEOVER
Previously, on Stargate SG-1…

SERIES OF CLIPS FROM "THE OTHER GUYS"

FELGER
They are so cool! Savor the moment, gentlemen. Savor the moment.

FELGER
Oh, they're in trouble…

FELGER
What would Colonel O'Neill do if he was here now?

[He hands Coombs a gun.]

COOMBS
You want me to shoot you?

[Scene of Felger and Coombs ringing onto the Goa'uld ship. Coombs hits the deck, and Felger starts shooting.]

FELGER
We're here to rescue you.

O'NEILL
We allowed ourselves to be captured…on purpose!

FELGER
This is great. You know, sneaking around with you guys in a Goa'uld pyramid on some alien planet. The only thing missing is some Jaffa chasing us…

[Jaffa chasing and shooting at everyone as they run towards an open Stargate.]

COOMBS
Felger…Jay?

[He pokes Felger's cheek.]

FELGER
Oh…what? What?

COOMBS
Snap out of it.

FELGER
Yes, sorry.

COOMBS
Calibration scales? The ring power source?

FELGER
Right there. Right…there.

END FLASHBACKS

INT—SGC—FELGER'S LAB

[Felger's assistant Chloe is making a final check of a strange-looking machine, while Felger peers through the glass in the doors, then begins walking around straightening things.]

FELGER
What time is it?

CHLOE
It's two minutes past the last time you asked me.

FELGER
Oh, she should be here any second.

CHLOE
Relax, Jay.

FELGER
Relax? We're on the verge of a major scientific breakthrough. This…this weapon could be the—the key factor in our fight against the Goa'uld.

CHLOE
Is it defeating the Goa'uld you're worried about, or impressing Major Carter?

FELGER
Hey, unlike some people in this room, I've seen what the Goa'uld can do, first hand.

CHLOE
Yes, I know, you've told me a thousand times. You rescued SG-1 from the evil Lord What's-His-Name.

FELGER
Her'ak. And he wasn't an evil lord, he was a First Prime.

CHLOE
Jay, you're a brilliant scientist. Someday you're going to win the Nobel prize. What do you care what these military types think of you, anyway?

FELGER
You don't get it. You know, when you've stood side by side with someone and stared into the face of death, it creates an unspoken bond, an understanding that transcends simple friendship. Colonel O'Neill and I have been to hell and back together. When the mission was over, he looked me in the eye and do you know what he said to me? He said—

O'NEILL
Is this gonna take long?

[O'Neill and Carter enter the lab. Felger has his back to them, and turns around at their sudden arrival.]

FELGER
Colonel O'Neill.

O'NEILL
Folger.

FELGER
Felger. I w-wasn't expecting you, sir.

O'NEILL
Yes, well, Major Carter said this was important.

[He reaches out to touch the machine. Felger stops him.]

FELGER
D—don't touch, don't touch, please. This is a finely calibrated device. It fires a focused plasma pulse.

[He imitates the beam's sound and trajectory, ending up in front of the target.]

FELGER
Boom!

[O'Neill looks at Carter for an explanation.]

CARTER
It's an energy-based weapon, sir. It could, potentially, replace the missiles on the X-303.

O'NEILL
Phaser?

CHLOE
More like a photon torpedo.

FELGER

My assistant, Chloe.
(He passes out safety glasses.)

There you are.

O'NEILL
Chloe.

FELGER
This is all based on a Goa'uld design. And if you'll join me to the rear of the weapon, we will proceed with the demonstration.

[They gather behind the machine. Felger picks up two electrical cords and prepares to plug them into each other.]

FELGER
My friends, I present to you…the 22nd century.

[He plugs the two cords together, and sparks fly. The weapon lights up and starts to hum. More sparks from the machine itself, a loud bang, a cloud of smoke, and lights go out all over the base. Moments later the emergency lighting kicks in. Smoke and sparks are still coming from the machine.]

FELGER
That wasn't supposed to happen.

OPENING CREDITS

INT—SGC—LEVEL 27

[The elevator doors open and Hammond and Felger head down the corridor, with Carter right behind them.]

FELGER
I know, but I am really, really, really sorry, General, and I can assure you that nothing like this will ever happen again.

HAMMOND
You're damn right it won't, because I'm pulling the plug on your research.

FELGER
No—no—no, please, General, this was just a minor glitch. A minor glitch. I mean, we are so close to a working prototype—

[They end up in the Briefing Room.]

HAMMOND
You've been saying that for the last six months. In fact, I've been reviewing your records. It seems that most of the projects you've overseen during your tenure here have been similarly long on promise and short on results.

FELGER
Right. What—what exactly are you saying?

HAMMOND
I'm saying it may be time for the Air Force to rethink your position here.

FELGER
Okay, you know, that-that would be a mistake. Because, um, you know, it just so happens that I'm working on a, uh, a line of research, and it's, uh, it's…well, really, I'm on the verge of a major breakthrough, really.

HAMMOND
Oh, really?

FELGER
Really, yes, yes., and it's-it's gonna be huge! Huge, this thing…and it's gonna make the plasma weapon look like a squirt gun, sir.

CARTER
What is it?

FELGER
Hmm?

CARTER
What is it?

FELGER
What is it? It's—it's, uh, well, really, you know, I'm not ready for a formal presentation just yet. You know, I still gotta…you know, crunch a few numbers and dot a few i's and…I could probably have something ready for you by the, uh, end of next week.

HAMMOND
You have twenty-four hours.

FELGER
More than enough time.

[He starts to leave, then turns back to salute Hammond.]

HAMMOND
Dismissed.

FELGER
Thank you.

INT—SGC—FELGER'S LAB

CHLOE
What were you thinking?

FELGER
I don't know! I had to say something, they were going to fire me! Besides, what's the big deal? All we have to do is think of something that's going to change the balance of power in the galaxy by noon tomorrow.

CHLOE
You have anything in mind?

FELGER
As a matter of fact, I do. Avenger.

CHLOE
You've got to be kidding.

FELGER
No, it's perfect!

CHLOE
It's nowhere near ready! It's just an idea!

FELGER
We can make it work.

CHLOE
Oh, Jay, this is exactly your problem. You try so hard to impress people that you always bite off more than you can chew.

FELGER
Okay. Yes, you're right. I have to start setting more realistic goals for myself. Right after this project. Okay?

He sits down at his computer and starts typing.

INT—SGC CORRIDOR

[Carter and Felger are walking. She looks at the file containing his proposal.]

CARTER
A computer virus?

FELGER
Yeah…see, when you think about it, the—the Gate network is nothing more than a bunch of linked computers. I mean, delivering the virus is as simple as dialing the target Gate and uploading the program.

CARTER
The virus would then scramble the DHD's established coordinates.

FELGER
Yeah, so the symbols no longer correspond with the proper coordinates, you see? It's like rearranging the letters on your keyboard.

CARTER
Then the target Gate would be useless.

FELGER
Yeah, I mean, sure, the Goa'uld have ships, but…you know, they-they still rely heavily on Gate travel and that would be a real tactical advantage for us, don't you think? What do you think?

CARTER
It's interesting.

FELGER
Really?

CARTER
But you don't have a finished program.

FELGER
Uh, well, uh, finished, not finished, per se, no. But I really still have to, you know, just—

CARTER
Crunch a few numbers, dot a few i's…

FELGER
That's really it. Exactly, yeah.

CARTER
Well, I'll take a look at it. If it shows promise, I'll take it to General Hammond.

FELGER
Oh, yes! Okay…

CARTER
Whoa, whoa…don't celebrate just yet. This is far from a done deal.

FELGER
No, no. Of course not, of course not.

[Carter continues walking. Felger waits until she disappears around a corner, then pumps his fists.]

FELGER

Yes! Yes!
(He starts to walk away, then comes back and looks all around.)
Where am I? How'd she get me here?

(He walks off in the other direction.)

INT—SGC GATE ROOM

[The wormhole is open. O'Neill and Carter walk into the room, with Teal'c and several others behind them. Everyone except Carter is geared up.]

O'NEILL
So, you'd rather stay here and geek out some computer program than come with us, huh?

CARTER
Don't take it personally, sir. I just think this research shows a lot of promise.

[They meet Hammond at the base of the ramp.]

O'NEILL
It's Felger.

CARTER
He did save our lives, Colonel.

O'NEILL
Yeah, don't remind me.

TEAL'C
The ability to disable any Gate we choose could prove to be a valuable weapon in our struggle against the Goa'uld.

O'NEILL
If it works.

CARTER
That's what I intend to find out.

O'NEILL

Don't forget your safety glasses.
(He turns to the other soldiers.)

Marines, thanks for joining us. Let's move out.

[They all go up the ramp, leaving Hammond and Carter behind.]

HAMMOND
To be honest, Major, I share come of the Colonel's skepticism.

CARTER
I know Dr. Felger's record is a little sketchy, sir. But I still think he shows a lot of potential. All he needs is a little support.

INT—FELGER'S APARTMENT

[Felger is working on a miniature scene, complete with trees, soldiers, and model Stargate. He looks through a magnifying glass as he paints one of the figures. A sudden knock at the door makes him jump, and he gets up to answer it. We see that the room is a mess, and Felger is dressed only in a T-shirt and boxers.]

FELGER
Just a minute…

[He goes to the door and peeks through the peep-hole. Carter is on the other side.]

FELGER
Oh, my God. Oh, geez…

[He jumps back and hurriedly tries to straighten up, stuffing something under a cushion on the couch. Then he grabs a pair of pants.]

FELGER
I'll be—I'll be with you in a second. Just, you know, uh, putting the dogs out.

[He slips the pants on and pulls them up. They are obviously on backwards, but he opens the door anyway.]

FELGER
Oh, Major Carter.

CARTER
I was in the neighborhood. This isn't a bad time, is it?

FELGER
Oh, no, no…please, come in, come in. Just, uh, you know, just, uh, really wasn't expecting anyone. I'm sorry.

[He closes the door, turns off the TV, and makes room for her on the couch.]

CARTER
Nice place.

FELGER
Oh, thank you, thank you. Yes, I was just, uh, having my apartment fumigated. Can I, uh, can I offer you anything?

[He picks up an open can of soda from his desk and pours some into a glass.]

CARTER
No, no, I'm fine.

FELGER

Oh, alrighty.
(He sets the cup down and gestures toward the couch.)

Please, please.

[Carter sits, then jumps up slightly and pulls out a Barbie-sized doll from underneath her. The doll is dressed in fatigues, and resembles her. There is also a male doll. Felger takes them both away.]

FELGER
Uh, what uh, what brings you by?

CARTER
I took your proposal to General Hammond.

FELGER
And?

CARTER
And he's agreed to give you another chance.

FELGER
Oh, thank God. Oh, thank God. That's great. That's great. Oh, whoo, 'cause I thought I was so done for after that little incident thing there. That was…

CARTER
Well, there is one condition…

FELGER
Sure…okay…

[He raises the soda can to take a drink.]

CARTER
He wants me to work on the project with you.

[Felger chokes on the soda, spitting it all over his face. Then he coughs, and wipes his face with a cloth.]

FELGER
That'd be, uh, you?

CARTER
Yeah, that's not a problem, is it?

FELGER
No, no, no…God, no. What about SG-1?

CARTER
Well, Daniel's working on a relocation project—P3L-997.

FELGER
The moon in the decaying orbit?

CARTER
They're experiencing some severe seismic disturbances and some weather anomalies.

FELGER
Mmm…and then, what about, you know, Colonel O'Neill? Teal'c?

CARTER
They have a series of negotiations with the rebel Jaffa leaders. There's been some infighting, some old rivalries cropping up.

FELGER
Well, they have to settle that…yeah, yeah, yeah. I guess that means you get stuck with me, then.

CARTER
No, no, I wouldn't put it that way. I think the basic idea behind the virus is, actually, quite brilliant.

FELGER
No…Really?

CARTER
Yeah.

INT—SGC—FELGER'S LAB

[Felger is looking at his reflection in the glass door of a cabinet, trying to tie his tie. Chloe walks in.]

CHLOE
A tie?

FELGER
I wear ties.

CHLOE
And cologne?

FELGER
You know, there is nothing wrong with a man taking pride in his appearance…and smell.

CHLOE
This wouldn't have anything to do with Major Carter coming to work with us, would it?

FELGER
Don't be ridiculous.

CHLOE
Here, let me.

[She starts fixing the tie for him.]

FELGER

Thanks. Of course, though, you know, you do have to admit, she possesses one of the most brilliant scientific minds of our generation, and a pair of legs that won't quit.
(Chloe pulls the tie very tight.)

Okay, okay.

CHLOE
Sorry.

FELGER
Well, anyway, what chance has a guy like me got with a woman like that? She barely notices I'm alive. You know what that's like?

CHLOE
A little.

[Carter enters the lab.]

CARTER
Morning.

FELGER
Oh, hi…hi.

CARTER
Nice tie.

FELGER
Oh, thanks.

[Carter puts her laptop on the counter and unzips the case, with Felger hovering just over her shoulder. She gives him a weak smile. Then we hear music in the background as we see a montage of scenes.]

[Felger types on his computer with Carter looking over his shoulder and talking to him. She pats his shoulder and walks away. Felger looks at her retreating form; then he goes back to the computer screen, but seems to have trouble concentrating.]

[Carter is writing code on a white board. Felger comes in with three donuts on a plate, bypassing Chloe and offering them to Carter. She turns him down. Felger starts to take one, then belatedly offers the plate to Chloe, who gives him a look and walks away. He bites into a jelly-filled one, then points to the board with the hand holding the donut and leaves jelly on the board, which he tries to erase.]

[Chloe is seated in front of two computer monitors, with Felger and Carter standing behind her. On the screens is what looks like the dialing program, accepting the Earth point-of-origin symbol. Chloe turns to them and smiles. Felger gets very excited and spontaneously hugs Carter around the middle, briefly resting his head on her breast before pulling back to shake her hand instead. Chloe and Carter hug. Felger offers Chloe his hand, and they shake.]

INT—SGC—HAMMOND'S OFFICE

[Carter places the completed report on the virus on the desk in front of him.]

CARTER
We think the virus is ready, sir. Of course, other than computer simulations, there's no real way to test it, except on another Gate.

HAMMOND
Do you have a target in mind?

CARTER
P5S-117. It's one of Ba'al's principal naquadah mining sites. If we could disable the Gate, we could seriously disrupt his supply network.

HAMMOND
How will we know if the test is successful?

CARTER
There's a Tok'ra operative on the planet who will be able to relay the results of the test through their sub-space communication network.

HAMMOND
Send the virus.

CARTER
Yes, sir.

INT—SGC—FELGER'S LAB

[Chloe is typing on the computer as Felger paces.]

CHLOE
You're going to wear a hole in the floor.

FELGER
Those Tok'ra are taking their sweet time, aren't they, huh? You think we would've heard something by now.

DAVIS

(over the intercom)

Major Carter to the control room. Repeat, Major Carter to the control room.

FELGER
That's it.

[He leaves the lab, coming off the elevator on Level 28 and side-stepping various personnel as he makes his way to the Control Room.]

INT—SGC CONTROL ROOM

[Felger enters at the same time as Carter.]

CARTER
Felger, what are you doing here?

FELGER
What's going on?

CARTER
Colonel O'Neill and Teal'c missed a scheduled radio contact.

DAVIS
Getting a video signal, sir.

HAMMOND
Colonel O'Neill, this is Hammond. Do you read?

[O'Neill appears on the monitor, his signal relayed by the MALP.]

O'NEILL
Nice to hear from you, General.

HAMMOND
What's your status, Colonel?

O'NEILL
Well, the mission was going according to plan. Then we hit a little snag. We can't dial the Gate.

[Carter and Felger look at each other.]

HAMMOND
Say again?

O'NEILL
We cannot establish an outgoing wormhole. We've tried all kinds of addresses but we just can't get a lock.

HAMMOND
Stand by, Colonel.

[Hammond and Carter look at Felger.]

FELGER
Whoa, whoa, whoa, this is just a coincidence. There's no way this could have anything to do with my virus. No…could it?

[Hammond, Carter and Felger all look at each other.]

INT—SGC—FELGER'S LAB

[Hammond, Carter, Felger, and Chloe are all standing in front of a computer monitor.]

FELGER
General, I'm telling you, there's no possible way Avenger could have had anything to do with this.

HAMMOND
Avenger?

FELGER
That's what I call the virus. You know, it's named after a comic book I read when I was a kid. The Amazing Avenger? Green tights, purple cape. He was super strong, super fast. You know, not as fast as the Flash, that would be ridiculous. Of course, this isn't ringing any bells with anybody, is it?

HAMMOND
Is there any chance we sent it to the wrong Gate?

CARTER

No, sir. We double-checked the coordinates. The virus was sent here—P5S-117.
(points to a spot on a computer star map)
Colonel O'Neill is on P3C-249, which is here.
(points to a different place on the map)

It is true that, relatively speaking, within the Gate systems the planets are close together—about 400 light years—but that doesn't necessarily mean anything. And until we hear back from the Tok'ra—

[Alarms begin sounding.]

DAVIS

(over the intercom)

Unscheduled off-world activiation.

[Hammond leaves quickly and Carter pushes Felger out of the way to follow him. Felger follows her, leaving Chloe alone in the lab.]

INT—SGC CONTROL ROOM

[Hammond, Carter, and Felger enter.]

DAVIS
Sir, we're receiving an audio transmission. It's the Tok'ra.

THELESS
This is Thelass of the Tok'ra.

HAMMOND
This is General Hammond of Stargate Command.

THELASS
General, I'm afraid I have to report a series of malfunctions within the Gate system.

HAMMOND
Malfunctions?

THELASS
Several Gates have gone offline. As yet, we have no idea why. We are still in the process of gathering information.

CARTER
Thelass, this is Major Carter. Do you have any information on a planet we've designated P5S-117?

THELASS
One moment, please. We are still waiting for a sub-space transmission from our operative in that system.

CARTER
Can you send us any data that you do have?

THELASS
Affirmative.

[One of the computers begins receiving data.]

DAVIS
Transmission received.

[Carter leans forward to begin looking over the data.]

CARTER
Sir, I'm going to need a few minutes to analyze this information.

HAMMOND
Go.

[She leaves. Felger crosses his arms and stares out at the Gate, until he notices the way Hammond and Davis are looking at him.]

FELGER
I'll go help.

[He leaves.]

INT—SGC—FELGER'S LAB

[Carter, Felger and Chloe all point to some information on a computer monitor.]

CARTER
There it is.

FELGER
I still don't see how this is possible.

CARTER
Automatic correlative updates.

CHLOE
I thought those were supposed to happen only once every couple of hundred years.

CARTER
That was the theory.

[Hammond enters the lab.]

HAMMOND
Major Carter, report.

CARTER
Sir, first I'd like to recommend that you begin recalling all of our off-world teams immediately.

HAMMOND
It's already being done. The mining team from P4F-221 is coming through right now.

CARTER
Well, you might want to tell them to hurry it up, sir.

HAMMOND
What have you got?

[Carter leads them back to the monitor with the star map that they were looking at earlier. She points to a particular spot.]

CARTER

This is the original target Gate.
(points to another spot)
This is Colonel O'Neill's position.
(hits return and a new screen appears)
These are the Gates first reported offline by the Tok'ra.
(hits return again)

A few minutes later, several more.

HAMMOND
They appear to be spreading out from the original Gate.

CARTER
Yes, sir.

HAMMOND
You still think this is a coincidence?

CARTER
Well, sir, we think we may have an explanation. We know that the Gate network has to undergo periodic correlative updates in order to compensate for stellar drift. Now, we've never witnessed it, but we believe that the Gates dial each other automatically to transmit the new coordinates that apply to each address.

HAMMOND
And you believe Dr. Felger's virus initiated one of these updates?

CARTER
It may have triggered an automatic internal protocol in the DHD. Before adapting the new scrambled coordinates, it dialed out and transmitted them to a few of the neighboring Gates who then transmitted to a few more and so on and so on…

FELGER
And so on…yeah.

HAMMOND
Is there any way we can stop it?

CHLOE
There's no time, sir. If each Gate only dials two others before adapting to the new system, the entire network will be infected in less than two hours.

CARTER
We need to focus on getting as many people back as possible, sir.

[Hammond gives Carter and Felger a look, then leaves.]

FELGER
He's really mad, isn't he?

INT—SGC CONTROL ROOM

[Several people come through the Gate and walk down the ramp as Hammond, Carter, and Davis look on.]

DAVIS
That's the last of the miners, sir.

HAMMOND
Shut it down. What's next?

DAVIS
P3L-997.

CARTER
That's Daniel's team, sir.

HAMMOND
Dial it.

INT—SGC—FELGER'S LAB

[Felger is breathing into a brown paper bag while Chloe rubs his back.]

CHLOE
Okay, breathe. Everything's gonna be fine.

FELGER
Grover Cleveland High School…

CHLOE
What?

FELGER
Chemistry 201…I had an incident with my midterm lab. They got the fire under control in about an hour. Poor Mr. Hoffman, his eyebrows never grew back. I should have got out of science right then and there, you know, saved everybody all the trouble…

CHLOE
This is Stargate Command. You wouldn't be here if you weren't very good at what you do.

FELGER
You tell that to Colonel O'Neill.

[Carter enters the lab and clears her throat, getting their attention.]

FELGER
How many teams came back?

CARTER
Three.

CHLOE
Out of how many?

CARTER
Fifteen. The rest are stranded.

FELGER
And Dr. Jackson?

CARTER
His team's still off-world.

FELGER
Oh, this is awful!

CARTER
The flood waters are rising, but they're safe for the time being.

[The phone on the wall behind Carter rings. She answers it.]

CARTER
Carter. General.

FELGER
Oh…General…

CARTER

Yes, sir. I understand.
(hangs up)

We contacted the Tok'ra. According to their intelligence, the entire Gate network is down.

[Felger breathes hard into the bag, and Chloe continues rubbing his back.]

EXT—ESTABLISHING SHOT OF THE MOUNTAIN AND A SOLDIER ON PATROL

HAMMOND
Colonel O'Neill, report.

INT—SGC CONTROL ROOM

[Carter and Felger enter the room to stand beside Hammond. O'Neill's image is once again coming through the MALP.]

O'NEILL
The mission's been compromised, sir. Looks like one of the Jaffa commanders sold us out. Go figure.

HAMMOND
What happened?

O'NEILL
The negotiations were going just fine…then the Gate broke down. After that, they all started accusing each other of sabotage and all hell broke loose.

CARTER
Sir, we think we know what caused your Gate to malfunction. It was the virus.

[O'Neill moves his face closer to the MALP's camera.]

O'NEILL
Felger's virus?!

CARTER
It created a new coordinate system that then spread to all the DHDs, but, since we don't have a DHD, we have the only Gate that can dial out.

O'NEILL
I told you not to trust that brown-nosing little weasel!

FELGER
He doesn't know I'm standing here, does he?

CARTER
Sir, I'm just as responsible as anyone else.

[O'Neill looks away from the camera as he hears Teal'c speaking to him.]

TEAL'C
O'Neill…

O'NEILL
We've got incoming, sir! It's an al'kesh…

[O'Neill dives out of the way, and there are two explosions before the screen suddenly goes black. The words SIGNAL LOST appear.]

DAVIS
We just lost video.

CARTER
They must have hit the MALP.

FELGER
He was just standing a few feet from it.

HAMMOND
Colonel O'Neill, what's your situation? Please respond.

[For several moments, there is no answer. Then, O'Neill's voice comes back through the radio.]

O'NEILL
We're still in one piece, sir.

FELGER
Oh, thank God.

O'NEILL
We're gonna take cover, sir.

CARTER
Sir, we still have an outgoing wormhole. We could send reinforcements.

HAMMOND
They'd be stranded like all the others. I can't send anyone until we fix this problem.

INT—SGC—FELGER'S LAB

[Carter, Felger, and Chloe are looking at pages of printouts.]

CARTER
Let's think this through logically. The entire Gate network has been paralyzed, but we can still dial out.

FELGER
And we're assuming that the virus was spread as a result of the correlative updates initiated by the DHDs.

CHLOE
We don't have a DHD, so our Gate was unaffected.

CARTER
Right. It also means another change would probably result in another system-wide update.

FELGER
So, if we can get just one DHD converted back to the old coordinate system, the Gate network would spread it for us.

CARTER
But how do you convert back to the old system, when the new one is based on a completely random principal?

FELGER
There still has to be a pattern. I mean, if we can get one DHD to establish a lock with a specific Gate, then all we have to do is compare that old address to the new address and extrapolate a translation program…yeah…

CARTER
That would mean random dialing.

CHLOE
Seven symbols chosen from a pool of thirty-eight nonrepeating candidates? That's about sixty-three billion possible combinations.

FELGER
She's good with numbers. I was going to get her to do my taxes.

EXT—ESTABLISHING SHOT OUTSIDE THE MOUNTAIN

INT—SGC CORRIDOR

CARTER
Any word from Colonel O'Neill, sir?

HAMMOND
No, we've been unable to reestablish contact. We hope he's just out of range.

CARTER
Yes, sir.

HAMMOND
According to our latest intelligence report, it looks like Ba'al is trying to take advantage of the situation.

CARTER
How so?

HAMMOND
At the moment, he has the largest fleet.

CARTER
And with the Gate system down, whoever has the most ships has the advantage.

HAMMOND
He's attacking the other System Lords on several fronts. And he's winning.

INT—SGC—FELGER'S LAB

[Felger is going through the printouts when his cell phone rings. He takes it out, looks at the caller ID, and puts it back in his pocket, unanswered. The desk phone rings next, and he picks it up.]

FELGER
Stargate Command, Felger speaking. Mom, Mom, no, no, I told you not to call me here. No, you're not even supposed to have this number. I'm sorry I didn't call, I had to work late, something came up. If you must know, Mom, I screwed up again. Yeah, and I think this is the worst one yet. No, no…it's worse than that one.

[Carter enters the lab, but Felger doesn't notice.]

FELGER
No, worse than that one too, Mom. Mom, I don't need a list of my personal failures right now, okay? I mean, to tell you the truth, Mom, I don't even know if I can fix this one.

[Carter clears her throat.]

FELGER

I'll have to get back to you on that then, Simon, okay? Alrighty then, bye-bye.
(to Carter)

A friend, it's Coombs…he says hi.

CARTER
Look, Jay, I know you feel bad about this.

FELGER

What's to feel bad about? I mean, it probably took the Ancients a thousand years to build the Gate system, and I—
(he whistles)

—wrecked it in a single day. Not to mention the fact that I've isolated us from all the off-world resources we're going to need to defend ourselves, leaving us sitting ducks for the next Goa'uld attack. But, who cares?

CARTER
Look I need you to get past feeling guilty and focus on finding a solution.

FELGER
That's easy for you to say 'cause you never make mistakes.

CARTER
I don't?

FELGER
Oh, come on, you're perfect. Everybody knows that.

CARTER
Jay, I'm not perfect.

FELGER
See, you have to say that because you're modest, which is just another aspect of your perfection.

CARTER
Have you ever heard of a planet called K'Tau?

FELGER
That wasn't your fault.

CARTER
I was the one who bypassed the dialing protocols that cause the wormhole to pass through K'Tau's sun. The chain reaction that resulted could have led to the deaths of everyone on that planet.

[Jay starts flapping his hands in front of him, interrupting her.]

FELGER
That's it! That's it! Oh, even your mistakes are perfect.

CARTER
What are you talking about?

FELGER
You were able to bypass the security protocol because you created your own dialing program.

CARTER
So?

FELGER
So, we can do that here. Instead of trying to tweak the DHD program back to its original form, why don't we just upload everything from our dialing computer?

CARTER
Our program is nowhere near as sophisticated as the one that exists in the DHDs. It's completely jerry-rigged.

FELGER
It doesn't have to be perfect, as long as the coordinate system is accurate. The DHD will automatically make all the necessary adjustments.

CARTER
How do you know that?

FELGER
Well, it's…okay, I don't. I don't. But the fact that Avenger triggered a correlative update seems to indicate that the DHD program is adaptive by it's very nature. And plus, we have nothing else. Trust me, Major, this is gonna work.

INT—SGC CONTROL ROOM

[Daniel's image is on the screen as he transmits through the MALP. The screen is wet, and he has to shout to make himself heard over the pouring rain.]

DANIEL
Yeah, sorry to rain on your parade, guys, but it didn't work.

[We pull back to see Hammond, Carter, and Felger watching.]

FELGER
It should have worked.

DANIEL
We tried dialing Earth and the Alpha Site, but we couldn't get a lock.

FELGER

You know, maybe there's something wrong with the upload.
(to Davis)

You can upload better, huh?

DANIEL
If you've got any other bright ideas, now would be a very good time.

HAMMOND
What's your status, Doctor?

DANIEL
Flood water's rising pretty fast and seismic activity is causing a lot of rogue waves. We estimate that within forth-eight hours, the entire city will be under water.

FELGER
It should have worked!

EXT—ESTABLISHING SHOT OF THE MOUNTAIN

INT—SGC BRIEFING ROOM

[Hammond and Carter are talking in front of the window overlooking the Stargate.]

HAMMOND
Have you and Dr. Felger made any progress?

CARTER
I can't find him.

HAMMOND
Excuse me?

CARTER
Apparently, Dr. Felger has left the base. I think the pressure was getting to him.

HAMMOND
I thought you said all he needed was a little support.

CARTER
Yeah…I may have been wrong about that. Okay, I admit it, he's a complete screw-up. He makes rash decisions based on sketchy evidence, he's clumsy in the lab, he's always late and quite frankly, it wouldn't kill him to ease up on the after-shave, But, the fact is, sir, he's at Stargate Command because he's a brilliant scientist. And no one understands that virus better than he does.

HAMMOND
Then, I suggest you get him back.

CARTER
Yes, sir.

EXT—BRIDGE OVER A STREAM SOMEWHERE NEAR THE MOUNTAIN

[Felger is standing on the bridge, tearing off pieces of bread and throwing them into the water. He watches as the current carries them downstream. Carter walks up and stands beside him, wearing civilian clothes.]

CARTER
Jay, what're you doing out here? We've got work to do.

FELGER
How did you find me here?

CARTER
I called your mother. She told me this is where you come when you need to think.

FELGER
This is the very spot I was standing when I figured out how to recombine epsilon particles in a sub-space matrix. Then I got mugged by some teenagers. Still, it's a nice spot.

CARTER
What are you doing?

FELGER
Feeding the ducks.

[Carter looks, but there are no ducks in sight.]

CARTER
I need you to come back to Stargate Command.

FELGER
You know, before I joined SGC, my idea of a high-pressure situation was defending a mathematical thesis in front of a room full of balding, middle-aged men. I don't do so well when the fate of the universe is hanging in the balance now.

CARTER
Jay, you designed the virus. You're the man for the job. Forget about the big picture for a second. Forget about the consequences. Just focus on the problem. Why didn't the upload work?

FELGER
I don't know. It should've. Every Gate in the galaxy should be back online, except for P5S-117.

CARTER
What do you mean?

FELGER
Well, Avenger's resistant to that type of tampering, you know? And I didn't think it made much difference since P5S-117 was sabotaged in the first place.

CARTER
Jay, what if the virus replicated itself and then traveled along with the new coordinate system to the other DHDs?

FELGER
No, that's impossible. It wasn't designed to do that.

CARTER
Well, it wasn't designed to trigger a correlative update, either. You said it yourself, Jay. The DHD program is adaptive.

INT—SGC BRIEFING ROOM

[Hammond and Carter are at the briefing table. Felger is pacing nearby.]

CARTER
Sir, we think we may have found a solution.

HAMMOND
Let's hear it.

[Carter looks at Felger.]

FELGER
You—you want me to tell it?

CARTER
It's your project.

[Felger draws up a chair and sits down at the table.]

FELGER
Well, General, we think we know why we were unable to upload a dialing program into the Gate system. It now looks as though the virus itself, somehow, transmitted along with the new coordinate system to the entire DHD network.

HAMMOND
The virus is blocking the upload.

FELGER
That's right. That's right, and we need to neutralize it first. But in order to do that, we have to find it.

HAMMOND
I don't understand.

FELGER
W—well, uh, the truth is, we don't know how the virus was transmitted. If it piggybacked with the automatic correlative update, that means it's buried somewhere within the dialing program itself. We're talking thousands of lines of code…you know, it would be like looking for a needle in a haystack.

CARTER
But we do know that the virus exists within a very specific sub-routine of the original target DHD on P5S-117. The catch is, in order to make this work, we have to reboot the system which means removing the control crystal. Someone's going to have to physically go to the planet, sir.

HAMMOND
P5S-117 is controlled by Ba'al.

CARTER
Yes, sir.

FELGER

General…
(stands at military attention)

I'd like to volunteer.

HAMMOND
Major Carter has the experience required for this mission.

FELGER
Oh, come on. I've got off-world experience. I battled the Goa'uld. I zatted a Jaffa.

CARTER
Sir, maybe it would be better if we both went.

FELGER
Major Carter's right. Nobody knows more about Avenger than me.

INT—SGC—FELGER'S LAB

[Felger is dressed in BDUs, putting duct tape into an already full pack, as Chloe approaches.]

CHLOE
Jay, this is crazy.

FELGER
Look, I caused this problem, I'm gonna fix it.

CHLOE
You're a research scientist, not a field operative.

FELGER

Did that stop me from infiltrating a Goa'uld mothership? I think not. Look, they've already sent the MALP. The Gate's not even being guarded. Probably, because it doesn't work any more, but don't worry about me.
(swings the pack onto his back, hitting Chloe in the process)

I know what I'm doing, okay?

[He starts to leave, but Chloe calls to him.]

CHLOE

Jay…
(picks up a CD and puts it in his jacket pocket)

The antivirus.

FELGER
Okay, yeah…yeah, I'm gonna need that. Alrighty.

[He starts to leave again, but she grabs his arm and pulls him back.]

FELGER
What?

[She grabs the lapels of his jacket and pulls him to her, kissing him.]

FELGER
What—what was that for?

CHLOE
Good luck.

FELGER
Oh…right.

[He goes out the doors, turns back to look at her, then leaves. Chloe goes back into the lab with a smile on her face.]

EXT—GATE AREA ON P5S-117

[Carter and Felger exit the Stargate, weapons ready, and look around.]

CARTER
All right, you get set up. I'll be back in a few minutes.

FELGER
Where are you going?

CARTER
I'm gonna to check out the area.

FELGER
Shouldn't we stick together? You know, in case you need back-up or something?

CARTER
I'll be fine.

[She starts to walk away.]

FELGER

Okay.
(loudly)

I'm good, too.

[Carter gives him a "shhh" gesture, and keeps going. Felger unhooks his backpack, keeping his gun close, and begins pulling out his equipment.]

INT—SGC CONTROL ROOM

[O'Neill is giving another audio-only update through the MALP.]

O'NEILL
The Jaffa landed the al'kesh and they're sending out search patrols. Teal'c and I have organized the rebels for a counter attack.

HAMMOND
Be advised, Colonel. Major Carter has gone to P5S-117. She's attempting to get the Gate system back on line.

O'NEILL
That's occupied territory, sir.

HAMMOND
Yes, it is.

O'NEILL
What team did she take?

HAMMOND
Major Carter didn't want to risk stranding anyone else.

O'NEILL
She went alone?

HAMMOND
Not entirely. Dr. Felger's with her.

O'NEILL
I'm inspired with confidence.

EXT—GATE AREA ON P5S-117

[Felger has taken the cover off the DHD and attached leads from his laptop, which he's typing into while sitting on a stone. Carter rejoins him.]

CARTER
There's no sign of any Jaffa activity in the area.

FELGER
I'm in. I'm in. Whoo…Just a sec, just a sec. Okay, something's wrong.

CARTER
What?

FELGER
This isn't Avenger. I mean, it's Avenger, but something's hinky. It's been altered.

CARTER
Hinky?

FELGER
The point is, this isn't the program I wrote. It's been tampered with since it was sent.

CARTER
Maybe it was Ba'al.

FELGER
Ba'al?

CARTER
Think about it. He stood the most to gain. He took your idea to bring down one Gate and modified it to bring down the entire Gate network, knowing it would give him an advantage.

FELGER
Huh…well, that means none of this was my fault. I told you Avenger wasn't designed to cause a correlative update.

CARTER
I wouldn't get too excited. It also means our antivirus isn't going to work.

FELGER

That's right. It's designed for the original program. CARTER

Which means that we are now stranded on a Goa'uld occupied world.

FELGER
So it's kind of a good news-bad news situation.

CARTER
The Jaffa probably aren't as protective of the Gate as they once were, but sooner or later, there's going to be a patrol. We have to do something.

FELGER
Well, I'm open to suggestions here.

CARTER
You said the virus was modified, right? So, all we need to do is modify the antivirus to match it.

FELGER
Okay, go for it.

[He starts to hand his laptop to Carter.]

CARTER
I was hoping you could handle it.

[She gets up and starts walking again.]

FELGER
Oh, I was afraid you were going to say that.

CARTER

(gestures with her P-90)

You wanna do this instead?

FELGER
Do you know how many variations I went through before I got the antivirus right? And that's when I knew what I was up against. This could take days.

CARTER
Well, then, you'd better get started.

[She leaves.]

FELGER
Yep…oh, yeah…

INT—SGC CONTROL ROOM

[Daniel is checking in again through the MALP. He still has to shout to make himself heard.]

DANIEL
Still no word from Sam?

HAMMOND
To be honest, we should've heard back by now.

DANIEL
Well, we're gonna have to abandon the Stargate and move to higher ground.

HAMMOND
Very well. Good luck, Dr. Jackson.

EXT—AREA AROUND THE STARGATE ON P5S-117

[Carter returns after another look around.]

CARTER
How's it coming?

FELGER
We're getting there. It's pretty cool, isn't it? You and I working together? We're sort of like the intellectual Butch and Sundance of the SGC.

CARTER
Butch and Sundance got cornered and killed by the Bolivian army.

FELGER
That's a good point, yeah.

[Suddenly, Carter sees movement at the far end of the clearing. She pulls Felger and his laptop down with her behind some stones.]

FELGER
What? What?

CARTER
We got trouble.

FELGER
Wh—what kind of trouble? What?

CARTER
Think Bolivia.

FELGER
Oh…Jaffa.

[Two Jaffa emerge from the trees and advance toward them.]

CARTER
They've made our position. Keep working.

[She moves forward, ducking behind more stones, and starts firing. One Jaffa goes down, the other returns fire.]

FELGER
Oh…

[More Jaffa enter the clearing. The stones in front of Carter take some heavy fire.]

FELGER
Concentrate, Jay…concentrate. Just background noise.

[The firefight intensifies. Carter shoots down another Jaffa.]

CARTER
How's it coming?

FELGER
I'm feeling a little rushed. There's not enough time. There's not enough time.

[Carter retreats to Felger's position and the fight continues. The Jaffa have them vastly outnumbered. Then, the sound of a ship approaching is heard. Carter and Felger look up to see an al'kesh moving into place over them. It begins firing on the Jaffa, and after several explosions, the horn blows and they retreat. The ship descends even lower. Felger covers his head.]

FELGER
Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.

[The ring compartment opens and the rings activate. Carter raises her weapon, but O'Neill and Teal'c appear and she lowers it.]

FELGER

O'Neill. Look, it's Colonel O'Neill! Thank God!
(runs to O'Neill and hugs him)

Oh, Colonel O'Neill, you wouldn't believe, you would not…thank God it's you…

[O'Neill takes off Felger's hat and hits him with it to get him to let go.]

O'NEILL
Felger…Felger!

[Felger lets go and takes back his hat.]

O'NEILL
What did I say about touching?

FELGER

Absolutely, absolutely.
(starts gesturing wildly)

It's just that we were over there, you know, and then they came…everywhere…and th—those guys…then you…over there…but now you're here. Now you're here. Nice one.

CARTER
How'd you manage this one, sir?

O'NEILL
We got tired of waiting.

[Felger starts to hug O'Neill again, but his stance and the sound he makes stop Felger in midaction.]

INT—SGC GATE ROOM

[Carter and Felger walk through the Gate and down the ramp. Hammond greets them at the bottom.]

HAMMOND
Major, Doctor, welcome back.

CARTER

Sir.

HAMMOND

I trust the solution you came up with is of a permanent nature?

FELGER
Oh, yes, yes. Not to worry, General. I've modified the antivirus, you know, specifically to target and neutralize the altered version of Avenger. But I've also added a little patch, you know, just to ensure that no one will ever—

CARTER
The problem is solved, sir—permanently.

HAMMOND
Dr. Jackson managed to get the remaining inhabitants of 997 through to the Alpha Site.

CARTER
Good to hear it, sir.

HAMMOND
What about Colonel O'Neill and Teal'c?

CARTER
They found an alternate means of transport. I promised the Colonel I wouldn't say anything. He wants it to be a surprise.

INT—SGC—FELGER'S LAB

[Felger and Chloe are making out, and speak between kisses. She's wearing a V-neck white blouse instead of her usual lab coat.]

CHLOE
I was so worried about you.

FELGER
It was no big deal.

CHLOE
Those Jaffa, they could have killed you.

FELGER
Not a chance, baby.

[He knocks everything off the table behind him, then picks Chloe up and puts her down on it. She lies back and he leans over her as they continue kissing. After a moment, Carter and O'Neill walk in.]

CARTER
What is this?

FELGER

Oh…
(pulls Chloe back up until she's standing again)

Hi, guys. I know, we're not really supposed to be fraternizing, but, hey…

CARTER
I turn my back for two seconds and you take up with this…trollop?

FELGER
Oooh…

[He puts his hands up and backs away from Chloe as she begins moving toward Carter.]

CHLOE
Don't blame me just because you were never woman enough to satisfy him.

CARTER
Ohhh…That's it.

[She pulls off her jacket to reveal a much lower neckline on her black T-shirt. Then she moves toward Chloe and both of them hit the floor. O'Neill moves in for a better look, as sounds of catfighting can be heard.]

FELGER
Whoa! Ladies, please, no, this isn't really necessary…

[O'Neill cuts him off.]

O'NEILL
Shh…don't talk.

In the distance we can hear Chloe calling as the camera zooms in on Felger.

CHLOE

Jay…Jay?
(pokes his cheek with her finger)

Jay…

FELGER
What? What?

[The camera zooms out again, and we see that the fight was merely a daydream; Felger and Chloe are alone in the lab.]

CHLOE
What were you thinking about?

FELGER
Nothing.

[He gives her a look, and goes back to working on his computer.]

ROLL CREDITS

transcribed by Carole for Stargate SG-1 Solutions

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--Kylie Lee 18:52, 28 Jun 2004 (PDT)